Welcome to the Family, Darth

Um... So this happened. His name is Darth Moss (named by Mason) and he is a 9 week old golden doodle.  He's got the sweetest little face.  He plays hard and naps hard.

He likes playing with ice cubes, picking up sticks and chasing Mason around (Mase doesn't love that last part).  We are working on potty training and he is we are doing really great. We are even working on ringing a bell when it is time to go outside.

Welcome to the family, Darth!

Darth Moss, 9 weeks old

We Don't Always Have to Make Smart Decisions

We finished our half marathon together!
I trained 6 months to run a half.  Richard ran a total of 3 times prior to the race.

After my first half, Richard caught the running bug and went out for a little jog... 9 miles later he came back.  I loved his passion and was jealous of his natural running ability all at once.  It took me 4 months and probably 100 runs to work my way up to 9 miles!

Since I was already trained up, I decided to enter one more half marathon, and Richard decided he was going to run it, too.  Mistake? Perhaps.  Making memories? Most definitely.  Listen up kids, here's the thing: We don't always have to make smart decisions.  I pray to God Mase doesn't throw those words in my face someday!).  Yes, stay away from drugs.  Yes, try to save a little of your money and invest your yearly contributions to your IRA's and 401k's.  But, sometimes you've got to live a little.  That might be dating someone you 'shouldn't.'  Buying a bright orange Coach bag when you were raised to buy neutral colors since they match everything.  That may be pushing through with a surgery that others aren't supportive of because you feel in your gut it's the right thing to do.  It might be running a half-marathon severely under-trained.  Sometimes you've got to live a little and take risks.

We had a great time on our run.  Although pretty sure I had more fun than Richard.  As I was running circles around him (literally, I'd run a little ahead, and then circle back to run with him), I was so proud of him.  This was hard.  He was totally unprepared.  And he stepped up anyway...  Just like he did this entire past year.  Sometimes we don't have time to think, we just have time to do. Sometimes we do have time to think and then we don't take risks.  The bottom line: We Can Do Hard Things.

Halloween 2015

Trick or Treating with the other Moss family!

Another costume... Richard and I skipped out on dressing up since we had a half marathon to run the next day.  

Happy Halloween!

Iron Man, Black Widow and Captain America

Race Day

This past weekend, I ran 13.1 freaking miles on my one year cancer-versary.  It was simply AMAZING.  It's an accomplishment I worked very hard for.  Something that no one can take away from me.  It was the end of a chapter (cancer) and the start of a new one (as a runner).  Believe it or not, I've never considered myself a runner... Until I crossed the finish line and decided I want to do another run.  I feel like I've finally earned the title of runner.

I wanted to share a bit about my race day.  

I set my alarm for 4:30am and hoped to sleep well the night before the race.  Of course, I didn't sleep well... I was wide awake at 3:30.  After trying to go back to sleep, I finally got up around 4am to start my OCD carefully planned out routine.  It wasn't the 13.1 miles that had me stressing out.  {TMI ALERT!!} My finely tuned routine had one goal in mind: a pre-race poo.  For any of you that run, you know how important this can be.  For weeks, I took mental notes about my routines and which activities would increased the chances of reaching my goal.  My routine was on point and 85% of the time, I could predict success.  All I needed was a cup of coffee, a half mile warm up, and indoor plumbing and BOOM! I was in business. 

Here's what my morning looked like Believe it or not, I actually took notes on my phone so I would remember the details of the day:

Pre-Race

4:00 - Up and at 'em.  Make coffee.  Shower and brush my teeth.  Goodness it's early. But, it's going to be a great day! I've trained so hard and it's finally here!

4:20 - Get dressed, eat banana.

4:30 - Write prayer list on my arm.

4:40 - Time to get the shit show on the road!  I decide to run The Link, the indoor tunnel that connects our hotel to the Crown Center.  I run for about a mile and a half, praying my colon body starts to wake-up. 

5:24 - I take coffee back to the room for Richard and go hang out on the toilet a bit.  As a psych major, I know the effects our environment can have on our behavior.  So, I figure it can't hurt to just go sit for awhile.  Still nothing.  

5:30 - It's got to happen soon, right?  I go down to my friend Carrie's room, where we talk about the race.  And poop.  I'm getting worried this isn't going to happen.  1.57 miles in.  Still not happening.  

6:15 - We meet our friend Whitney and Whitney's mom in the lobby.  We are going to do a quick jog to the WWI Memorial (I'd say it was maybe a half mile away).  It was cool and crisp.  Union Station was lit up blue for the Royals and Whitney is telling us about her Grandpa, who has a bench named after him at the memorial.  We get to the bench, say a prayer, and decide it's time to get back down to the start line.  

6:40 - Our hotel is close to the start line, so I run back up to the room to try to go one more time.  At this point I'm panicked!  The race hadn't even started yet and I've logged 3 miles already and still no dice.  

6:45 - I kiss Mase and Richard as they are in bed.  Mase is up and we do our family 'handshake' where we put our hands on top of each others and yell 1...2...3...Moss.  It puts me in a good headspace to hit the course.  

6:50 - Carrie, myself, and 11,000 other runners get in the chute (sort of like a corral for runners).  I feel the urge to pee, but don't have time to go because the race is going to start soon.  I'm nervous, I've worked so hard to poo, I'm positive it's going to hit me sometime during the race.   

The Race

7:10ish - The race starts.  The energy and excitement can be felt in the air.  Holy cow, this is happening.  And I haven't pooped.  Just go with it, Julie.  It's too late to worry about that now.  Enjoy it! You've got this!

Mile 3 - I'm praying for my marriage, per my prayer list.  Richard sends me a quick text of encouragement that I can read on my watch.  Rascal Flatts's song Won't Let Go starts to play on my Beats.  Richard would play this song for me when we were traveling to our doctor appointments.  Tears start to flow.  Dammit.  Stop crying Julie.  Suck it up.  Crying takes energy.  And you need the hydration.  Stop it!   

...You think you're lost.  But you're not lost on your own.  You aren't alone.  I will stand by you.  I will help you through.  When you've done all you can do, you can call.  I will dry your eyes.  I will dry your eyes, I will fight your fight.  I will hold you tight and I won't let go.  It hurts my heart to see you cry.  I know it's dark, this part of life.  It finds us all when we're too small to stop the rain, oh, but when it rains, I will stand by you.  I will help you through...  (Rascal Flatts, Won't Let Go)

Mile 5 - I'm praying for my Gillispie family and I quickly text my sister (thank you Apple watch for enabling me to text while I'm in the middle of a race.  Apple: Feel free to send me a free one for this endorsement).  Jill starts sending me texts of encouragement.  She has been following me the entire time using a tracking app.  She's encouraging me and telling me about water stations coming up.  Even though she was in Florida, it feels like she's running with me.  Another boost.
Mile 8 - I'm getting tired.  I've done a few hills.  The excitement of the start line has worn off.  Still a long way to go.  I round a corner and hear this familiar voice yelling "Go Julie! Go Julie!"  I look around and it is my friend Alicia, who lives about an hour away from KC.  We logged a lot of miles about 3 years ago, navigating motherhood.  Alicia ran a half marathon (I started training with her, but quit).  She knew exactly what I was feeling.  I stopped very briefly to give her a hug and a kiss and she told me to keep running and that she was proud of me.  She's got tears in her eyes and I'm choking back tears again.  She spent a precious morning traveling and fighting the crowds to come cheer me on for all of 3 seconds.  It's just the boost I needed to get over that 8 mile slump.  As I run away, I look back and can see her cheering me on.
Mile 9 - Richard sends me a quick text letting me know that he will be at Mile 11 (with him are my in-laws and Mason).  Another boost... Plus the Sport Beans I ate at mile 5 are starting to hit.  I kick it up a notch.  The motivation that my family is just a mile ahead keeps me going strong.
Mile 10 - I'm praying for all Survivors, especially those I've come to know in a Surviving Together Facebook group.  Praying for those who fought the battle and lost.  Praying for those who signed up for clinical trials so that I could get the best treatment possible.  Again, another boost to keep me going.
Mile 10.5 - I am running hard, okay as hard as you can after running 10 miles, and I'm looking for my crew.  I do this for about 15 minutes, expecting to see them any minute.
Mile 12 - I finally see Richard, Mase on his shoulders and my in-laws.  I quickly stop and give them high fives.  Mase thinks I'm like a super star athlete.  I can hear him ask "Daddy, is mommy winning?" Richard says "Yep, she's winning!"  Talk about a major boost!  I know I'm close to the end.  I've got about 10 minutes of the race left.
Mile 12.5 - I round the home stretch (although a half a mile is still a long ways after you've ran 12) and again, I see Alicia.  She's yelling that she's proud of me and tells me to finish strong.  I'm humbled.
Mile 13 - I see the finish line.  I'm soaking it in.  I'm a bit sad the race is coming to an end.  I feel so strong in that moment.  I'm proud of myself and cannot believe I've done it.  Cannot believe all that has transpired over the past year.  I quietly whisper "I WIN."  And, I'm thankful I didn't have to poop during the race.
After the race, I meet up with Alicia and my family.  Mason is so excited about my medal and decides  he wants to wear it.  Of course, I let him.  I know this was a team effort.  This entire year has been a team effort.

My cheering section!
My friend Alicia who was there to cheer me on in the very moment I needed a cheerleader.
Carrie, Whitney and I celebrating the finish.
My prayer list.
1...2...3...Moss cheer.
My race swag.

Oh, and my story was mentioned on the front page of sports in the KC Star!  You can read the article here: http://www.kansascity.com/sports/other-sports/article39351111.html

Summer 2015

Mase - 5 years old

This kid!  He's our entire world.  He's spunky.  Loves chocolate milk and dressing up in superhero costumes.  Dislikes cheese and washing his hair.  Loves his daddy.  Loves his cat.  Dislikes babies.  Such a blessing to call him our son.  We love you Mason John!

Florida Family Vaca 2015

Another great family vaca in the books!  Again, the entire Snyder/Moss clan gathered in St. Pete's Beach for a week of family fun in the sun!  It was an amazing trip!  The best part... Spending a week surrounded by family and seeing Mason smile ear-to-ear from being with his cousins all week.

This happened all week long!

Fisher, Noah and Mason 

Even though it was a Moss family vaca, my sister made a trip down for the day.  

Goodness, I love our little family.

Love Mason's face here!

The gang.  So blessed to be part of this family.  They welcomed me with open arms from the get-go.  

4th of July

We celebrated the 4th of July with some great families this year!  Mase particularly enjoyed the slip and slide, being surrounded by friends and the red, white, and blue cake. We are so blessed.  Blessed to live in a great country and blessed to be surrounded by some great people here at the Lake.

One of the Happiest Places On Earth

My apologies if you get tired of all the Jeep pictures I post...  Truth is that our Jeep is one of my happiest places on Earth.  It reminds me of when Richard and I were dating.  We fell in love on country back roads, just cruising around with the top down, sipping on Starbucks, and belting out some of our favorite songs. 

I remember being pregnant with Mason and imagining family Jeep rides, just as my family did when we were kids.

I remember this winter, driving to chemo, when Richard and I decided to trade the Tahoe in for yet another Jeep because we realized life was just too short to not make memories.  Yes, the Tahoe was extremely comfortable, but Jeeps are where memories made.  It took all of one day for Richard to make the switch (as you can see, I really had to twist his arm!! HA!).

And yesterday, as we celebrated Father's Day, I loved feeling the wind in my hair, the sun on my head, our kiddo laughing in the back and seeing my handsome husband lead our family down gravel roads, taking in the moment.  We still fall in love on our Jeep rides.  In love with each other.  In love with our family.  And in love with the life we have been given.

Speaking of Father's Day, I asked Mason a few questions about his Daddy on Father's Day. 

Q: What makes Dad happy?

A: Water

Q: What does Dad do when you aren't around?

A: He works and goes poop.

Q: What is Dad really good at?

A: Tying my shoes.

Q: What does Dad do for a job?

A: He works.

Q: How do you know your dad loves you?

A: Because he gets me fish.

Q: How old is Daddy?

A: 100

Spring 2015

SpiderMan

Nannie giving Mason loves.

Mase's first trip to the dentist.  He did great!  And no cavities!

Easter 2015

It's time to play ball!

Julie and Mason visited the Halsey's in Florida.  We had a great time! 

I asked Mason if he wanted to sign up for golf lessons.  We ended up at the park to hit some balls around.  I'll take that as a yes.  Blessed that he has a daddy who worked all day and didn't think twice about packing up some clubs and driving across town to hit some balls.  

Mother's Day 2015

Mase and his buddy Liam

We've spent lots of time at the park with friends

Yay for family Jeep rides.  My favorite thing in the world! 

Mase loves family Jeep rides too 

Richard and Mase had guy time during one of my treatments.  They ended up with a $75 Build-A-Bear.

Mase & Mommy date.  Cruising around with the top down.  We had a kids golf clinic, played at the park, hit up the pool, then the son-cone shack, Miner Mikes, hit up another park, got a donut and then met Daddy for dinner.  

Happy Birthday, Dad!

Birthday cake made by Mason

Richard's birthday falls on Mother's Day this year, so instead of both of us scrambling around buying gifts neither of us need or want, we decided to forego gifts.  Honestly, I hate that his birthday falls on Mother's Day.  He has been beyond amazing this past year and he deserves a day all to himself to be celebrated.

Mason and I decided to make him a chocolate (cheese) cake.  Mase refuses to eat anything with the word cheese in it (who's kid is this??), so we are calling it a chocolate cake.  In fact, it's a triple chocolate cheese cake.  Shhh! Just don't tell Mason.  

My little helper doing some quality control.

Counting out the cookies for the crust very carefully.

More quality control.

We ended up with cocoa powder everywhere!

So proud of himself!

Mommy/Son Trip to Florida

Julie sure missed her sister!  Great to get to hang out together for a few days.

We had such a great time hanging with Jack and Jill

LegoLand!

Cousin's being silly

Tuckered out 

A few family snuggles before bed

Mason absolutely loved swimming at the Halsey's pool

Florida was great.  But Mom's favorite part was getting to spend some very special one-on-one time with Mase. 

Beach bum 

Stud

Because if you are on vacation, you can dress up (even if it's just a random day in April)

A little treat to cool down after playing at the park

Mom spent her mornings sipping coffee by the pool

Mase dominated at go karts!

Good byes are so hard, so we do "See you laters".  There are tears under those glasses.